When you honor people, honor them regardless of what’s in it for you.
The fake honor and respect that comes from what you’re getting or what you plan to get messes up the relationship dynamics and whatever you’re looking for!
Materialism doesn’t always occur when you have. It is there whether you have or not. It shows in what you bow to in any economic state.
Because why does this person suddenly stop being revered when you hit your target, you change levels or get what you want?
You need someone to recommend you to a contact up there and they suddenly become a ‘mentor’. We don’t need smart glasses to detect these inconsistencies. Stacking up titles and hailing people to high heavens to get an opportunity, something you will not do normally is a form of materialism.
If you despise people you once honored because you don’t need what they were giving you before you are a despicable human who is actually poor.
If money determines who you value and regard while others who don’t have as much are trampled on, you are of all men most miserable.
There used to be this brother in the neighborhood I grew in Ibadan circa 2000. He was older. I met him in church when I was more younger and I have not seen him in years. A few years ago, when I visited home, I saw him on a commercial motorcycle fending for himself and his family and I waved him from a distance and bowed, “egbon” as a form of respect. In those split seconds I saw that disappointing scowl on his face. He felt bad. That was not how he wanted to be seen. I instantly looked away from that scowl and shouted “egbon” a street brotherly lingo that means ‘elder’ he lightened up and waved back and that was it!
I know many of my colleagues and even young folks who automatically become unreachable when they become richer, drive a better car etc. Everyone they have respected and honored suddenly becomes irrelevant and lazy as long as they feel they don’t need anything from them anymore. Life is not tied to only benefits.
Respect and honor are not tools of positioning as most people weaponise it today. I see it everywhere. On the streets, in the neighborhood, in the boardroom, in church etc. They are the right of every human who deserves it. They are not economic instruments. Don’t reserve it for some and deny others of it without cause.
Selective honor based on materialism destroys the fabric of our culture, society, and the world. Respect people because they are humans, push it ahead if they are valuable, don’t do it because they have more money than you. If you do, it’s a litmus test for your poverty that came out positive. Character is consistent regardless of whether you are gaining or not gaining. Honor is not a tool of manipulation!
In the family, if you have an elder brother you’re richer than, know your place. Society will pressure you to take his place because you have money. Straighten up. Think beyond privileges. Think about the invaluable worth of people and essence that money cannot buy.
Have a great weekend and breakthrough from within.
©Abiola Iyiola, 2025
